log

[empathiclord.livejournal.com]

Rating: PG-13 for angsty Shishido
Dated: Uh- before the other log? (1/2)
Summary: Atobe gets a surprise visit from the bird man of the BH, bonding, video games, and a demonstration of Atobe’s latest power.

Ohtori was still awake, but he was off training, and Shishido didn't want to look needy and say that his boyfriend skip it so they could make out or something pathetic. Even if he was bored he wasn't about to hunt Ohtori down and demand the electrical mutant entertain him. He was an independent being, he found ways to occupy himself before he was in a steady relationship, he could certainly do it while he was in on.

That in mind he bundled up his PS2 equipment and a few games and headed down the hall to Atobe's room. Kicking at the door once in a version of knocking before entering the room. "Yo, wanna play with me?" He asked as placed the equipment on Atobe's bed. It had been far too long since he'd bothered the Ego.

Atobe had been lazing on his bed, staring off into space and trying again to practice dropping his field and keeping his latest power from manifesting and taking over again. He refused to become so overly joyful that he rolled on the floor and laughed until he couldn't breathe, and the bouts of moody depressions that had him nearly paralyzed were a bit overkill even for a self-proclaimed drama-queen.

A split second after the knock, if that was what you wanted to call it, he smirked and quickly pulled up one of his novels to at least look like he was doing something. "You should learn to ask before just coming in- one would assume the last time would have taught you as much."

"Hey I knocked." It was more than he usually did, and more than Atobe did when he barged in on him and Ohtori all post coital. "I brought fun, so play with me." Shishido said, moving over to Atobe's tv and plugging in the PS2. "Pick a game and prepare to lose Mr. Ego."

Blinking at the games, he rolled his eyes and pointed out a fighting game at random. "I take it by your mood that you and the Mrs. made up?" He smirked slowly, not going to apologize for what happened again. "I'll beat you."

"Choutarou realized he had no reason to be mad with me and I came clean with all my other exploits." Shishido said putting the game in to the system and tossing a controller to Atobe. "We even went to see my parents. They didn't scare him away." He smiled a bit lopsidedly before flopping down on to the bed, wings barely flapping back in time to avoid being sat on.

"Tch, put your money where your mouth is Atobe. I'll beat you anyday." Shishido bragged as he punched a few buttons to get to the right menus.

Catching the controller and juggling it in his hands a moment, he settled back on the side of the bed and waited for the game to start. "You introduced him to your parents?" He hadn't dared do anything like that with Kunimitsu. They were just 'friends'. "And watch the feather dusters, will you?"

Pushing a few buttons and choosing his character, he smirked. "Sounds like a bet."

"Yeah why not? I told them about him at Christmas more or less." Shishido said shrugging, his wings following the motion and coming close to smacking Atobe. "And if you don't like them shift down." Wings were a great excuse to take up more fluffy bed space.

"Name the wager. I'll win so I don't care what it is." Shishido grinned and choose his favourite character. He had spent many a night beating out his sexual confusions and later frustrations on this game.

Grumbling lightly and shoving one wing over, he watched his character dancing on the screen and preparing for the fight. "You can always go sit on the floor."

Staring to attack Shishido's character, he shrugged himself. "I don't know. Perhaps I'll borrow your abilities to deliver something for me."

"Can you not touch me?" Shishido asked as his wing ruffled and fanned out to smack against Atobe. "And I'm not sitting on the floor like some dog." Atobe would probably forget he was there and kick him or something.

Shishido had his character dodge the first attack and start on a counter attack, he just had to build up enough energy for his special moves. "Fine, I win you can go buy me some snacks."

Smacking the wing back gently, he frowned darkly. "Just watch where you swing the damn things, they are attached to you, so it shouldn't be hard." He'd probably kick him for amusement, not out of forgetfulness.

"It's a miracle you aren't the size of a house. All you ever think of is food."
Shishido huffed and flapped his wings. "Just because they're attached doesn't mean they always listen." He explained, "Just like you can't always control your powers." And why couldn't Atobe just scoot down on the bed, not like there wasn't room.

"You're just jealous you can't eat whatever you like without packing on pounds." Shishido beamed, "It pays to have a high metabolism." Not to mention an intense training session each night... usually joined with more pleasurable ones with Ohtori.

He was not going to go into controlling his powers right now, as it was he had to consciously keep from trying to read Shishido's feeling and alter them. He didn't do that to people he considered....friends.

"I'm merely not getting as much exercise as I used to, and my figure is flawless."

Shishido smirked when there were no more retorts about his wings taking up too much space. It let him focus more on his character and less on his extremities. Atobe's character was almost dead for this round, Shishido just needed one more good hit to take him out.

"Haven't you been training? I thought they were supposed to start you on hand to hand." Shishido said absently flicking his eyes over to Atobe and then back to the screen. "I don't know... I've seen better.

"I have been, the problem is most don't get close enough for hand to hand." He smirked lazily, watching his character fall over and die in an almost comedic display of pixels. "And people call me the egotistical one?"

"Unlike you, I actually work out. Besides, I wasn't talking about me... for once." Shishido grinned victoriously at Atobe and hit some buttons to start the second round. "And why aren't people getting close enough? You don't smell that bad."

"Just because I don't need to to keep my waist trim. He smirked and started the next fight off with a few good hits, even if he'd always swear video games were childish and a waste of time. "Ha- ha. My mutation finally settled on its latest change...and it's not...very pleasant."

"My body is perfect on its own. I just work out to tone it up." Shishido said, frowning as his character was dropped to the ground before he could even land a kick or punch. This round wasn't going his way, but he could still win. "And what do you mean by not pleasant?" He was almost afraid to ask.

"Of course." He poked the winged teen, "Is that a love handle I see there, or are you planning on laying an egg?" He quickly landed another series of attacks while insulting his friend. "And extremely unpleasant, I've been on the receiving end of it. But if you promise to try and stay calm, I can demonstrate."

Shishido squawked and ruffled at the insults. "I'm male! I don't lay eggs." But too late he noticed the ploy and turned and saw as his character balanced perilously close to being knocked out. "I can do calm. But do I get a warning?" He asked glancing over at Atobe. He trusted the blonde not to hurt him, but that didn't mean the other wouldn't embarrass him.

Killing off the other character, he nodded silently and turned to sit and face Shishido. "Close your eyes, and tell me- how do you feel right now? Then I want you to think the happiest thoughts you can." He'd quickly find a small doubt in the back of his mind and turn it to fear, paranoia, or depression. "When you are ready, let me know..."

Shishido scowled as his character died but then turned so he was facing Atobe more. "Alright." He closed his eyes and took a breath. It was difficult to put in to words what he felt when nothing really stood out. "Curious, a bit worried, and I guess umm is competitive a feeling?" Maybe he was feeling too much for his friend... Well he was a complicated guy. Thinking about the happiest thought was easy though. Ohtori accepting his rock, Ohtori wanting him to make love to him again, Ohtori saying his name. He was sure he was grinning like an idiot. "Ready."

Atobe almost felt bad about this while Shishido looked so happy, but he had wanted to see it. Looking around he found the smallest bit of concern that he would be left alone and no one would love him over his mutation and actions. Bingo, isolating that doubt he pushed it harder into Shishido's conscious making it more and more depressing so it would weigh down on his friend, it would hurt. The process made his stomach turn as he watched the other's wings twitching with the start of things to come.

One minute Shishido had everything he wanted in the world and was feeling as if nothing could go wrong but then he found himself feeling as if his world was ripped out from under him. His eyes widened in horror as he wondered if all his happiness was just some sham, if Ohtori wasn't going to leave him for Kaidoh or some pretty little woman. His wings twitched and trembled with each doubt he felt.

It was so easy to imagine Ohtori tossing the rock back at him, telling him it was a useless paperweight, that Shishido's mutation disgusted him, that it disgusted all his friends. Even those that thought his wings were pretty couldn't stand how bird like he was. He could feel tears welling up in his eyes. What would he do without his friends, what if his family didn't even accept him back.

Shishido felt nothing but emptiness and despair, as if all his fears had come true. But there was still somebody with him. Atobe was still there with him and he knew that Atobe had wanted to test out his powers. Was Atobe doing this to him? "S-stop... don't." he uttered more to his thoughts than to Atobe as he curled himself in to a ball.

The moment the water works started, Atobe pulled his power back quickly and caught the trembling bird-man, hugging him and whispering reassurances to him. "It's okay- I told you it was unpleasant...it's not really..." He tried calming him down the moment he whimpered more pleading.

Shishido clung tightly on to Atobe as if he was the only person keeping him afloat in an ocean. "God that was horrible." He muttered, rubbing his face against Atobe's shirt to wipe away the tears. His shaking and ruffled wings wrapped around Atobe in a hug before pulling back and flapping, the motion repeating in a distressed pattern. "Felt like I would never be happy again. Your powers did that?" He asked.

Hell he would not want to mess with Atobe. It reminded him of Oshitari's powers in a way, but instead of supplying him with the thoughts Atobe only gave him the emotions. His own mind was the one that lead him down that destructive path... that was the scary thing.

"Shh...I know." He had to actually lose consciousness to get his to stop, at least he'd stopped before the worst of it. As the hug ended, Atobe sat back a bit watching Shishido and frowning thoughtfully. "They did, and that was the tip of the ice berg, I'm afraid to find out how far I can push someone."

Shishido was reluctant to stop the hug, but he pulled away, it was probably awkward for Atobe, and if someone walked in, it'd be hard to explain. Wiping at his face with his hands, he settled back in to his spot and picked up his controller. It was so uncool to be crying like that, but hell he'd never felt like that before. "It was like you were some crazy ass dementor from that Harry Potter series." Shishido said, his mind trying to grasp at happier things again to fill that void he still felt there within him. "And if that's the tip of the iceberg I'd hate to see what else you're hiding in that head of yours."

Nodding and picking up his own controller, he closed his eyes and took a calming breath. He wouldn't tease Shishido for this, as far as he was concerned it had never happened. "I wouldn't know. I don't read children's books." Though he might look it up later, if he became curious or bored. "That was all in your head, I keep my issues at bay my own way. I am not always a projector, you know."

Shishido hit the buttons to start the next round, but he wasn't really in to it anymore. Even if Atobe was amplifying his feelings, that meant he still had those thoughts and feelings. Yeah it was natural, but it was scary as hell having to face them. He just tried to push it aside. When he was done hanging out with Atobe he'd go hunt down Ohtori and demand cuddles and attention, he didn't care how needy it made him look. "And Harry Potter is world renowned. Only the ignorant call them children's books." He'd even attempted to read the original English versions he had liked them so much.

Noticing the way the other wasn't bragging or carrying on, he frowned slightly. "If you just want to stop, say so. I am not going to pick on you for it. I didn't come out of my room for 3 days..." He pushed a few buttons absently. "I'm just not interested in that sort of thing."

"I'm fine." Shishido said, though it was still clear he was anything but fine. "Just play, don't think your tricky subterfuge will win." Though he knew it would, his eyes were still blurry from tears and there were slight trembles still running through his hands. But Shishido's didn't give up. "Is that why you dropped off the face of the earth for a bit there?" It must have sucked having to go through that alone and not knowing if there was an end to it. There were times when he was very thankful he had a physical mutation, even if it meant making going out shopping a pain in the ass.

"You'd like these. I bet you'd connect with Draco Malfoy." Shishido said with a small smile, he'd just have to lend his copies to the arrogant blonde.

Shaking his head, he quickly killed Shishido's character and put down the remote. "We can schedule a rematch when you aren't shaking like a leaf." Reaching over, he grabbed Shishido's hand and offered a small smile. "That was why I did, and I am sorry I had to hurt you like that to get you to understand it." Smirking, he kissed his hand playfully. "Even if you cry like a girl."

Shishido swore and then tossed his controller beside him. "I'm not shaking." he said pointlessly, his wings ruffling up a bit more at the lie. Some days he felt like Pinocchio except with wings. Sighing, he forced himself to try and relax, letting Atobe apologize to him and take his hand, though his eyes snapped open as it was kissed. "I do not cry like a girl!" He protested pulling back his hand with a huff. "You said you wouldn't pick on me!"

"You are. You do. And I'm not." Atobe replied calmly and watched the wings twitching irritably. "Go do something to reassure yourself. You’re a pain to deal with when you're being a melancholy little turtle dove. Now scoot. I won, so you can deliver the book on my desk to Tezuka as my prize."

"You have a funny way of not picking on people Atobe." Shishido said as he slid off the edge of the bed. On his feet he noticed just how bad he was still shaking, he really didn't feel that bad anymore, but he guessed his body needed some time to recover or something. Grabbing the book off the desk he looked at it and then over at Atobe.

"I'll get the book to him in the next couple days." Shishido said as he looked back over at Atobe. He was happy to know that Tezuka and Atobe were still trying to work things out. "And sorry I'm such a pain, you can borrow the ps2 for a bit if you want." Maybe Atobe could work on his moves a bit, but it was really because he didn't want to bother with it right now. He just wanted to leave and find his boyfriend.

Smirking, Atobe nodded and waved his hand dismissively. "Very well, I'll practice my fighting in the game- go find Sparky and bug him a while." He was compensating for a slight feeling of guilt by being a bit more rambunctious than he normally was. But something had to help. "Good night, wings."

"I'd practice it out of the game too. You're getting a bit wide around the middle." Shishido teased a bit gesturing with his hands how wide Atobe was becoming. It was good that he could still tease with Atobe, he just wished this doubt and shaking would leave him already. "Night Mr. Ego." He slipped out the door an in to the hall before they could throw anymore insults at each other.

Ohtori would probably be in the gym, so he'd check there first, well second, he'd just peek in Ohtori's room first, with luck his boyfriend would be there.